I don't remember a lot of what I went through, and I lost/had my journals taken away as I cycled through the system. At one place I was not allowed outside for 3+ months. One night I had a very difficult phone call with my parents. I was sobbing as I got off and went to cry in a corner. One of the staff came to tell me that I was not allowed to be there, but I stayed. A couple people came to comfort me, and every time someone came, she (the staff member) would force them to leave, threatening them with consequences. She even said, "If she wants to be comforted she can go cry in _______ (one of the main 'rooms')" They staff were supposed to be trained, etc. to deal with this. It is so hard to talk about, and it hurts that I can't remember.
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